Updates to Past Columns – Lucky, Adam, and Surrogate Flaming

Loyal readers will no doubt remember my experiences with the many people in Los Angeles and elsewhere who have yet to master the art of telephone dialing, recounted in my column This is Lucky, I Need to Speak to Rosa! earlier this year.
Well I have an update – just the other day while having a rapid-fire telephone session, with both lines and the cell phone ringing constantly from politcal clients, film folk, and others, I got an odd call. I picked up the cell and heard the following:
Caller: “Ok, everything’s all set, you need to call So And So* right away to make sure you have directions. Everything else is ready and we’re looking forward to seeing you soon!”
Me: “Um….who are you and why are you calling me?”
Caller:”Who’s this?”
Me: “Let me guess. You’re looking for Adam, right?”
Caller: “Yes, this is his mother, Edna*, is he there?”
Me (wanting to be a smartass but too nice to do so): “Actually you’ve dialed a wrong number – but dont’ feel bad, most of Adam’s friends call me all the time!”
Caller (Aka Adam’s Mom): “Oh no! That’s just terrible! Well I’m going to speak to that Adam of mine right away about this!”
Adam’s Mom and I talked for a few minutes and she was an amiable and pleasant person. It turns out Adam and I have almost the exact cell phone number, with mine ending in “4” and his ending in “1′ – which are near each other on the keypad, and easy to mistype, especially on today’s smaller cell phone keypads.
She resolved to let Adam know that this was going on, and thanked me for not misdirecting calls to the County Jail. Meanwhile I’ve changed my outgoing message to tell Adam’s wayward friends where to go. Hopefully Adam will be returning the favor when someone calls his phone looking for me when they want to send bags of cash to the Schädelmann.com Fun Fund.
Another followup: Some folks disputed my predictiions for the decline in campaign rhetoric this season when I wrote about my views on said subject a while back.
This morning I read the inimitable wit of Georgia Senator Zell Miller, a retiring Democratic Senator who is supporting the President’s re-election, in a fit of petulance because he was passed over for a second cup of punch at a Democratic holiday party some time ago.
It was rather amusing to read Mr. Miller’s comments, especially since he seems to be cribbing off of my sheet when he suggested that the military under Kerry would be reduced to being armed with “spitballs.”
Memo to Zell Miller – Crap on Kerry all you want, but if you keep ripping off my wacked out rhetoric, I want a royalty check pronto. Otherwise, come up with your own methods of slandering Sen. Kerry, and stop copying me!
Ok, perhaps that was a bit over the top – but then again I’d say he was too, so everyone’s even. Hoo-ray.
*Names have been changed to protect the innocent, especially Adam’s mom – she’s a nice lady who was pleased to hear I got a column out of my cell phone woes.
© 2003-2006 Greg Dewar | All Rights Reserved | Originally Published at www.schadelmann.com

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